"Woman" - a new chemical element

Here is something for chemists with skills in Russian language. All other folks - sorry but haven't got any time for translating it.

НАЗВАНИЕ: Женщина
СИМВОЛ: Fm
ПЕРВООТКРЫВАТЕЛЬ: Адам
АТОМНАЯ МАССА: 60 кг; также встречаются изотопы от 40 до 250 кг.
РАСПРОСТРАНЕННОСТЬ: Очень распространен.

ФИЗИЧЕСКИЕ СВОЙСТВА.
Тает при определенном воздействии. Самопроизвольно закипает и без внешних причин охлаждается. Коэффициент расширения: увеличивается с годами. Мнется при сдавливании в определенных местах.

ХИМИЧЕСКИЕ СВОЙСТВА.
Очень хорошо взаимодействует с Au, Ag, Pt и другими благородными металлами. Поглощает дорогостоящие вещества в больших количествах. Может неожиданно взорваться. Быстро насыщается этиловым спиртом. Активность варьируется в зависимости от времени суток.

ПРИМЕНЕНИЕ.
Широко применяется в декоративных целях, особенно в спортивных автомобилях. Является очень эффективным чистящим и моющим средством. Помогает расслабиться и снять стресс.

КАЧЕСТВЕННАЯ РЕАКЦИЯ.
Приобретает зеленую окраску, если рядом находится другой образец более высокого качества.

Essential additions for the workplace vocabulary

BLAMESTORMING: Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.

SEAGULL MANAGER: A manager, who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and then leaves.
ASSMOSIS: The process by which some people seem to absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the boss rather than working hard.
SALMON DAY: The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die in the end.
CUBE FARM: An office filled with cubicles.
PRAIRIE DOGGING: When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.
MOUSE POTATO: The on-line, wired generation's answer to the couch potato.
SITCOMS: Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage. What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids.
STRESS PUPPY: A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiney.
SWIPEOUT: An ATM or credit card that has been rendered useless because the magnetic strip is worn away from extensive use.
XEROX SUBSIDY: Euphemism for swiping free photocopies from one's work place
IRRITAINMENT: Entertainment and media spectacles that are annoying but you find yourself unable to stop watching them. The O.J. trials were a prime example.
PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE: The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again.
ADMINISPHERE: The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve
404: Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message "404 Not Found," meaning that the requested document could not be located
GENERICA: Features of the American landscape that are exactly the same no matter where one is, such as fast food joints, strip malls, subdivisions.
OHNOSECOND: That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake
WOOFYS: Well Off Older Folks.
CROP DUSTING: Surreptitiously farting while passing thru a cube farm, then enjoying the sounds of dismay and disgust.

(Source: Recruiters Network)

Visa cardholders hit with $23 quadrillion charges

I've got another encouragement to carry on with my sufferings in terms of PhD business. Maybe I can save the world one day (I haven't even tried to forbear the hidden irony).
We all know that IT makes up a crucial component of today's business, especially in the banking sector. Below you can read what happens if IT doesn't play along. According to CNN news (original article can be found hier) some Visa cardholders in the US have been hit with charges of over $23 quadrillion after a technical glitch.

A number of customers using the firm's prepaid products found their accounts had been charged $23,148,855,308,184,500 - which according to CNN is more than 2,000 times the size of the US national debt.

One man, Josh Muszynski from New Hampshire, discovered he had been affected when he checked his Bank of America account online after buying a packet of cigarettes at a petrol station.
In a statement, Visa said that a "temporary programming error" at its debit processing services was to blame for the glitch, which it sat affected "fewer than 13,000 Visa prepaid transactions".
The firm added that the issue has been corrected and the "erroneous" figures have been removed from customers' accounts.
Visa announced earlier this year that it is trialing a new type of credit card that uses unique codes in order to combat fraud.

A very powerful ad

I always admired British campaigns. The one blow is a parade example of one. Take a good look at it - this will teach and inform you a lot about your behaviour.

Do you like your job?

Before complaining about you job think twice. One should bear in mind that there are other people out there, who can be even worse off... like that pitiful guy in the video. Ihonestly feel sorry for him.

And now recall the question from the post title - do you really like your job?

An unmistakable message

This is a picture of a doorplate... was definitely a bachelor's door.
Here is the translation for non German speaking folks:

Please, please,
whatever knocks on my gate,
be a gift of heaven
and be
female, gorgeous and willing.
If it is not the case:
JUST BRING BEER!

I am not feeling anything

Animals are sometime such a great mirror of the human kind...

The new era of laziness

After I've seen this picture on the mobile of a friend I just couldn't deprive the world of it. The cat instantly rocketed to the mascot of the department and introduced an unprecedented level of laziness. It's hilarious how the tom is chilling on the porch.