Female dictionary.
- Yes = No
- No = Yes
- Maybe = No
- We need = I want
- I'm sorry = You'll be sorry
- We need to talk = I need to complain
- Sure...go ahead = I don't want you to
- Does my bum look big in this? = Tell me I'm beautiful
- Do what you want = You'll pay for this later
- I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron!
- Are you listening to me?? = Too late, you're dead
- You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me
- Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs
- You're so.. manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot
- Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive
- It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now
- You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about??
- I'll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV
- How much do you love me? = I did something today that you're really not going to like
Male dictionary.
- I'm hungry = I'm hungry
- I'm sleepy = I'm sleepy
- I'm tired = I'm tired
- Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
- I love you = Let's have sex now
- I'm bored = Do you want to have sex?
- What's wrong = I guess sex tonight is out of the question
- I love you, too = Okay, I said it...we'd better have sex now!
- May I have this dance? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
- Can I call you sometime? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
- Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
- Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
- Will you marry me? = I want to make it illegal for you to have sex with other guys
- Let's talk = I am trying to impress you by showing that I am a deep person and then you'd like to have sex with me
- I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I am gay
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